Just when I thought I could reach for it, there is certainly something I can't go against..

So much so for being enthusiastic, positive about something that i reckon it will turn out the way I suppose. There is apparently another thing I can't go against or rather I wouldn't go against.

Much effort has been into it but the status was reflected on hold or maybe a full stop? It makes me much depressed that I wouldn't want to start thinking about when the next sun rise would be.

Sigh! well... Walking down the streets, looking at the receipt after I withdrawn some cash. I decided to commit suicide. I bet u never know having no moolah in your pocket is worst than anything else and who says money couldn't buy u happiness! bull shyt! .. Oh ya, back to committing suicide, I diverted my attention by being a shopaholic for the next 4 hours.. I easily spend $80bucks without feeling a thing. uhm..guess I'm serious about dying on that worst path. Couldn't figure out when is the world gonna end... I continue shopping.

Maybe god took a pity on me because nothing else caught my eyes. sigh! Anyway... I have no idea how to express my mood today. I decided to arrange my photos and revamp my room but I ran out of materials just when my engine got heated up. Thanks! -.-'

Anyway... half way done ...

Friendship Compatibility

Pei says that a Cancer clicks with Virgo and ... taDah! 101% So True =)

When Cancer and Virgo form a friendship, it creates a strong and down-to-earth intimacy and connection that will only grow stronger with time. Both Signs are goal-oriented and disciplined. Cancer and Virgo are sincere and devoted to their goals and to one another. Both have a strong sense of purpose. They admire each other: Virgo respects Cancer’s quiet strength and dedication, while Cancer appreciates Virgo’s adaptability.

This is a friendship that may take time to develop, but it will get stronger. The Cancer-Virgo pair is based on common sense and strong principles. These friends can be materialistic, as they both enjoy comfort, but they are willing to work hard for the things they enjoy. Difficulties can arise if Virgo is too critical for Cancer’s easily-bruised feelings; Cancer needs to understand that this is Virgo’s nature and not a personal attack. Virgo might dislike Cancer’s stubborn streak but can learn to be patient and understanding of the Crab’s nature.

Additionally, Virgo enjoys indulging Cancer — the Virgo’s commitment to service combines well with Cancer’s love of nurturing, thus pleasing both. Cancer is ruled by the Moon, and Virgo is ruled by Mercury. Both of these Planets are close to the Sun, so they’re always in the same neighborhood even though they are very different. The Moon is matriarchal; it’s about cultivation and nurturing, both of which are important to Cancer. Mercury is about communication, and it’s androgynous — Virgo will take on the form that it chooses. Virgo has a more intellectual approach, but they are adept at reading other people. Because of this, Virgo can quickly understand and become the devoted and perceptive friend that Cancer needs, and they won’t argue about whether one is being more attentive than the other. Cancer is a Water Sign, and Virgo is an Earth Sign. Earth Signs are about possessions, and the Cancer-Virgo friends usually like to be surrounded by comfortable, well-crafted possessions.

The Water Sign relies on emotion and intuition, making Cancer the fueling force behind the friendship in a quiet way. They share aspirations to prosperity and a love of a fancy home life. Additionally, they are a practical pair, and they rarely have problems caused by one partner’s lack of control. Cancer is a Cardinal Sign, and Virgo is a Mutable Sign. While Cancer tends to propose new ideas, Virgo likes to move from one thing to another as the feeling takes them. Because of their ubiquitous nature, it’s easy for Virgo to find a place in Cancer’s plans.

Virgo can remember Cancer’s plans and eventually will make them produce something even if Cancer has moved on. The best aspect of the Cancer-Virgo friendship is their dedication to their shared goals and interests. Both enjoy stability and nice things, and Virgo likes helping Cancer achieve their goals. Their mutual interests make theirs a highly compatible friendship.

不只是朋友

你从不知道我想做的不只是朋友

还想有那么一点点温柔的娇纵

你从不知道我想做的不只是朋友

还想有那么一点点自私的占有

我的车站

人生过得太快，我选择当自己的司机, 寻找着你

但久了，我的归属感却不见了

当你出现了之后， 才领悟这一切都是值得的

可是你始终选着离开

我只好等待， 下一个出现的还是你

idk

Is hard to wait for something u know that might never happen but it is harder to give up when u know it is everything u want.

Blogging @ buddy buddy cheers after countless drinks...

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Till we meet again

Time checked: 6.55AM

45分钟的路程，空荡荡的街， 雨水打在脸上。
很想哭但眼泪却不见得到哪， 也许干了吧。(这时才明白张惠美的歌)
香烟一根一根的点燃，只怕失了魂的我不知该往那儿走。

自以为潇洒的我， 拿得起就放的下。
原来我的心胸。。很小。或是看对人事务吧。
酸了! 我就认了吧， 我真的不服输。

我不懂的欣赏这门游戏，怎么不是一加一等于二呢!
我把性命都赔上了但却输了。我不甘心。

Check out: 7.30am

The process

Say Hello to goOdbye

Hey there stranger, how have you been
Feels like i'm standing on the outside looking in
at the mess we left behind
And it's a long way to fall
I gave you everything I had
I gave it all
And then my heart was on the line

I can't hate you
any longer
I know i'm going to miss you
I'll forget it and let it go.

Say hello to goodbye, cuse its gone forever
No more try, you and I
Not now, not ever
And i'll get by without you
I'm not going back again
I'm not going to lie to you
Cuse, that was there and only then.

And this is how it has to be
Cuse' its a deadly combination, you and me
You know its undeniable
Even though we tried it all
We brought the worst out in each other
I recall
We can't act it anymore

What doesn't kill you
It makes you stronger
And though i'm going to miss you
I'll forget it and let you go

And even though the tears will dry
I can't completely disconnect
Couldn't make the compromise
Didn't have a safety net

是不是每一个人都像我一样笨

我们说好就算分开一样做朋友
事实上我们从此不可能再问候

为何还说个谎话，让自己心疼

我能感覺　另外一個人
為何這樣的諷刺
放不開　也看不見未來

CNY 2011

While everyone is having a blast in the festive season. Fighting against their diet with the pineapple tarts and the nuts. Having reunion dinner, overnight mj session and a list of events I could easily list down. I pray for a little warmth within my family, family of 4+3 sitting down on the dinning table that was bought 22 years ago which was initially meant for us dinning together.

Years after years, it never came through and I certainly do not carry any hope on it. All i wish was my mum to stop venting all her frustration on me for them not coming back. Seriously this is none of my business when things doesn't operate in one way. Is a give and take for goodness sake.

This CNY, I'm here on the very extreme end fighting against my own survival rate. No shit. Even my mum wish I get strike by the lighting but sadly it didn't came true. Deeply traumatised by this incident of bypassing the so called '' death passage way'' and did a round about back breathing again. It is definitely a gift and not a given rights.

Sitting alone in the clinic, watching the second hand ticks. you got to accept the facts that when you needed someone the most, u see no one in sight. Esp in this period, who give a shit about you.

My health is deteriorating and I never thought it could be that worst. I guess the best gift to my ''beloved boss'' was that $152 medical fees. That's something I proud of before I leave that company with no welfare. *F that.

To think I manage to survive this time, maybe that imply that I must fulfil many of those incomplete task that I've always mentioned.

May us be in good health.